Monday, October 19, 2009

tomorrow

Posted by danielle at 8:49 PM
Tomorrow, I'd rather not wake up. Why you ask? Because then I have to face the shit hole that is my life. I know that sounds terrible. But, it's how I feel. Nothing goes right for me. I have a beautiful little girl who needs me...but I don't want to get out of bed in the mornings. I have a husband, who unfortunately thinks less of me by the day. It would be easier to not get up anymore. I don't do anything right. I lose my patience with Lexi far too often. I always pray for forgiveness for it at the end of the day, because I know it's wrong. But, I get so irritated with her crying/screaming all day. Tonight she was screaming while I was giving her a bath and getting her ready for bed. I couldn't stand it. It just gets under my skin. I know she's spoiled to being held all the time, but there's nothing I can do about it now, besides listen to her cry. But dammit I'm a good mom. I don't care what he says or what he thinks he sees. I love that little girl with my whole heart and there's nothing I wouldn't do for her. She's the only thing keeping me alive right now.

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