Wednesday, March 11, 2009

hormonal

Posted by danielle at 9:13 PM
Okay...I guess this pregnancy is making my hormones crazy! I feel out of control.
#1 Glen, Jenn, and Zoe are going to California for a week...they are leaving tomorrow. Since they walk next door I go over there almost every other day. I've mentioned it before...I'm sure it gets on their nerves, but once Alexia gets here I feel like I'll be trapped here. I love Zoe and the boys so much! Just to see them for 30 minutes or so makes me happy! So, we walked over there today to tell Zoe bye. I bought her a Disney Princess word search book (because she told me the word searches I got her for Christmas were too hard) so she could have it for the car ride. We stayed over there and played with the boys for a while. When we got ready to walk home I gave her a hug and told her to have fun. I almost cried! I'm seriously crying now just thinking about it. I'm going to miss her! I don't know if it's just that or that I'm jealous I can't experience her trip to Disneyland with her.
#2 Zander and Zavier are staying here while they are gone on vacation. Nanny Vicky is keeping them during the week and then they are going to stay with my parents on the weekends. That means I won't be able to go see them very much during the week either. I just love those boys! The day I found out Jenn was pregnant was the day after I found out I miscarried. It was hard...I remember crying to my mom that night...because it just wasn't fair. Then the day they were born, when I came home from the hospital I called my mom crying again. Not for what might have been, but just because I already loved them so much. How is there going to be enough love in my heart for Alexia? I know there will be...but I can't imagine loving anyone any more than I love those kids!
#3 I feel like I'm constantly in pain. My back hurts, I have a toothache, acid reflux/heartburn daily...and my bladder is a trampoline. I hate complaining about it. I'm not complaining about the pregnancy...just about the pain!
#4 Me and Jacob had a stupid argument last night..but even that made me cry. But, I'm stubborn enough that he couldn't know that I cried! I had to cry alone and quietly just so he wouldn't have the "pleasure" of knowing he had gotten to me. No one breaks me...especially not him! It's all better now...but I feel so bad!
#5 My stupid PCP hasn't okayed the refill for my prozac. Hello...I need it! I requested the refill on Saturday...so the pharmacy called him Monday. I checked on it today and they still didn't have a response from him. WTF?!? Why should it take that long? I don't want to be a crazy person over vacation, so I haven't taken it the past couple of days to hopefully give me enough pills to stretch over the weekend.
#6 On CSI: New York tonight there was a car bomb. I knew it would happen, but they mentioned the OKC bombing...for some reason tonight that really tore me up!
Well, a combination of the tylenol pm and the crying during this blog has made me relatively sleepy. Hopefully I can get a good night's sleep for my root canal tomorrow!

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